Our assistants need to get married too sometimes.
Feb 6th 2007diyanazmanDiyana@Work
My assistant Bobby ( not his real name) is getting married. I am very fond of my assistant. He is very efficient, hardworking and helpful. When I ask him to use the thick Annual Report to crush the back of my head whenever he sees me falling asleep on my desk, he will instead use my ridiculously huge laptop! To ensure I don’t go drift back to sleep, he shrieks loudly
“that one is for screwing my appraisal, you skinny pig!”
I always jump wide awake immediately! You can never find a co-worker as sweet. He even calls me skinny!
Sometimes, when he goes out to the run important office errands, he brings me back lotsa delicious cekodok pisang; and it takes me just once of threatening to report to the HR about him installing the cctv at the ladies’ and snooping on me smoking pot in the loo.
When Bobby takes 2 weeks leave for his wedding receptions, the world comes crashing down on me. Not only have I lost the touch of the most talented graphic designer of the company in my blueprints but I also seem to lose the loyal bearer of my bathroom slippers.
I emerge to a state of hectic busyness till I forget to read all the messages about Friendster closing down sent by my intellectual friends. I think there are about 50 of those messages in my Friendster inbox now.Today I need to send close to 200 units of blueprints to our corporate members by post. I also have a dozen more articles to write. The clerk has to cover for the receptionist and the tea lady is too busy serving vodka to the board of directors in the meeting room. While dancing.
So who is gonna lick the stamps?? 200 stamps? And place the blueprints into the envelopes? And paste the mailing address on the covers? Who? Who? Who?
I can now feel the energy released from chemical reaction between particles of salt crystal while they combine and change into the substance of fist size stone in my bladder. Because I don’t have a chance to take a piss yet! I dont even know when will I get my ganja dose for the day! And its 10.27am already!
Yes, those pictures are real. Emi took them. Nope the story is not so real. Bobby would never call me pig!?? That’s a haram animal ok? He calls me baboon!
Congratulations on your wedding Bobby!
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10 Comments »
i still pening if i...
azman
on 06 Feb 2007 at 11:20 am #
kesian dia..
tak tau pulak org panggil baboon kat opis..
essentric
on 06 Feb 2007 at 11:55 am #
I like ur office. I will print out the pictures for my boss to see. He says my work place is a mess. Huh! He obviously has not seen the state of mess you’re in! Hurhurhur.
diyanazman
on 06 Feb 2007 at 6:09 pm #
Dear Doreen,
Pls dont get me wrong or get your boss to get me wrong.
My place is only messy when my assistant is not around…
If he is working, I can always find where my laptop is…!
No problemo!
Err..Thanks for err..liking my office..eheh!
Me~
on 06 Feb 2007 at 6:18 pm #
Kesian D.
I understand how u feel~honestly @_@.
iena Amoi
on 06 Feb 2007 at 9:00 pm #
Is that really your office? Oh My GOD!!!! What a mess?!! You better asked that Bobby of yours to come back as soon as possible. Dia panggil hang baboon? Ish ish ish…..memang kenalah tuh…hehehehehe
iena Amoi
on 06 Feb 2007 at 9:01 pm #
Frankensteina
on 07 Feb 2007 at 8:31 am #
Oh blimey I remember that day in the office when Diyana turned into a psychotic-stamp-licking gurl! I was almost sure that she’d run around the office shrieking on the top of her (very skinny) lungs “Bring my Bobby back” while pulling her kurung top over her head
It wasn’t pretty y’all…hihihihihihi. Love you babe!
My world turned upside down too with Bobby on leave. And I have to say Bobby have nice piece of *ss
Hihihihihihihih!
rashatie
on 07 Feb 2007 at 1:49 pm #
is that ur office???thanks God i got better than that…on my desk only got my notebook, file server machine and a few ring file…….and not forget..a few boxes of biscuits…hahhahha
Nurin
on 08 Feb 2007 at 12:04 pm #
Is that ur working place…..mine is nicer
nyda
on 09 Feb 2007 at 12:15 pm #
sabar lah….nama pun keja….jahatnya kawan awk panggil awk mcm tue….hehhe…