Last Friday while the three of us was chilling in front of our current rented house, Kak Sal, our next door neighbor walked by. I casually asked how she was doing and the answer was also casual and friendly. But what she told us next was too shocking and it had changed our lives 180 degrees.
“Eh, have you guys not hear anything?” she asked “Everybody has been talking about the Pontianak behind our houses!”.
My jaw almost dropped to my boobies, “Huh?” that was all I could reply.
“Yes..” she continued, “My daughter heard a woman crying at the mango tree last night, Mr Chan has heard sounds as well and the Indian neighborhood security guard has SEEN HER TOO!”. I scanned her facial expression and boy wasn’t she dead serious?!
To my non-Malaysian readers, a Pontianak is a female ghost, one of the most feared in this region. Often seen in dark, lonely roads, waving down vehicles for a ride in a form of a beautiful woman dressed in white, before changing her appearance into something out-of-this-world ghastly, sure to leave you running for your life, crapping in your pants. She is known for her wailing cries or giggles and would make the hair on your neck stand and send chills down your spine. Apparently, there is one hanging out at the big mango tree behind my house. Bummer!
We told Kak Sal that we have never heard anything unworldly before but I just couldn’t help but cry, “KENAPA KAK SAL BAGITAU KAMI???”.
This is one information I seriously do not wanna know. Things like this you all must keep secret away from me at all times, because it would spin me through a state of acute paranoia and illusive obsession of the evil spirit to a point that I have to pee or poo in the toilet with the door open and install spot lights at the haunted area in the size of a gas canister that could light the entire Stadium Bukit Jalil. On top of that, Azman (or Miki) has to accompany me to the kitchen anytime I need to fetch a glass of water. That is when I am close to dying of thirst, hunger meanwhile could wait. Do you know that a human being can go on living for eight days without eating? I rather die than go to the kitchen aloneeeeee….
Anywayyy… Kak Sal ended our conversation with “Yeah.. just watch out. I see you tend to leave your back door open at night… Akak balik dulu ye?”
Azman and I exchanged glances.
To be honest, when Kak Sal broke the news to us, I wanted to laugh out loud and told her that – KAK SAL, THAT WAS NOT A PONTIANAK, THAT WAS JUST ME!!!!!
But I don’t think she would find that funny plus she would think I am crazy for screaming like a banshee at wee hours in the morning.
But seriously you guys, crying sounds?? At midnight or one am? I am quite positive that that was just Miki, fighting his parents with all his might, screaming his lungs out NOT WANTING TO GO TO SLEEP. And the screaming sounds of a woman? You mean like this – “MIKIIIIII…. GO TO SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPP……”
Eheheh.. excuse me neighbors but that might just be me.
I didn’t voice this out to anyone, not even Azman until he poured out the same thought voluntarily awhile later. “That’s just us, I am confident!” he said, “the crying is Miki and the screaming you!”
Come to think about it, wow, gila puaka jeritan ku siyallll… satu kampong ingat aku Pontianak!!? Ini sudah lebeeyyy.. Neng Baizurie pun belum tentu boleh menakutkan masyarakat majmuk 1Malaysia kat taman aku… Perghhh! hebattt!
Confident or not. Whether or not the so-called Pontianak is me; I have spent an hour cooking in my kitchen last night while reciting Ayatul Qursi. Once every 3 seconds I would peered out of my window in the look out for the nasty Malay vampire.
I was like, peel onion skin – Allahu laaa ‘ilaaha ‘illaa….
Cut onion in halves – Huu. ‘Al-Hayyul-Qayyuum…..
Pour cooking oil into pan - Laa ta’khuzuhoo sinataw (n) walaa Naom…
Dekat 40 kali ulang uols!! Berkat makanan iols malam semalam. wakakakaka!
I also need Azman to accompany me to the kitchen one minute later than 9pm onwards. In fact, he was supposed to go out and watch Manchester United vs Aston Villa for Carling Cup final last night, but due to the fact that the game should finished at ONE IN THE MORNING; I begged him to watch the game at home and not leave me… huaaaa…. Mummy takottt!
So anyway I hope to be able to forget about the Pontianak behind my house and resume my life like usual. I am just gonna continue to assume that whatever those people have heard was just me and Miki but in the mean time.. KORANG JANGAN TANAM PAKU KAT TENGKOK AKU PULAK!!! *pengsan*
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