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Our assistants need to get married too sometimes.

My assistant Bobby ( not his real name) is getting married. I am very fond of my assistant. He is very efficient, hardworking and helpful. When I ask him to use the thick Annual Report to crush the back of my head whenever he sees me falling asleep on my desk, he will instead use my ridiculously huge laptop! To ensure I don’t go drift back to sleep, he shrieks loudly

“that one is for screwing my appraisal, you skinny pig!”

I always jump wide awake immediately! You can never find a co-worker as sweet. He even calls me skinny!

Sometimes, when he goes out to the run important office errands, he brings me back lotsa delicious cekodok pisang; and it takes me just once of threatening to report to the HR about him installing the cctv at the ladies’ and snooping on me smoking pot in the loo.

i am going crazy i need help

When Bobby takes 2 weeks leave for his wedding receptions, the world comes crashing down on me. Not only have I lost the touch of the most talented graphic designer of the company in my blueprints but I also seem to lose the loyal bearer of my bathroom slippers.
I emerge to a state of hectic busyness till I forget to read all the messages about Friendster closing down sent by my intellectual friends. I think there are about 50 of those messages in my Friendster inbox now.Today I need to send close to 200 units of blueprints to our corporate members by post. I also have a dozen more articles to write. The clerk has to cover for the receptionist and the tea lady is too busy serving vodka to the board of directors in the meeting room. While dancing.

So who is gonna lick the stamps?? 200 stamps? And place the blueprints into the envelopes? And paste the mailing address on the covers? Who? Who? Who?

i am underpaid

I can now feel the energy released from chemical reaction between particles of salt crystal while they combine and change into the substance of fist size stone in my bladder. Because I don’t have a chance to take a piss yet! I dont even know when will I get my ganja dose for the day! And its 10.27am already!

Yes, those pictures are real. Emi took them. Nope the story is not so real. Bobby would never call me pig!?? That’s a haram animal ok? He calls me baboon!

Congratulations on your wedding Bobby!

10 Comments »

Avoid singing in soprano if you sweat at weird places


Rummaging through old junks can really be great fun! And on rare occasion you can get to untangle hidden mysteries; unearth precious treasures or in my case last Friday, found a couple of pictures dated 1998 that are so valuable. Who would believe stacked among pictures of corporate launchings and AGMs are photos highly contributive to the well being of my personal state of humor; evidence to rare scientific phenomena and most importantly these pictures are fresh stimuli for me to submit a proposal to Rexona.

Sweaty picture

This is what I found at the office. Can you spot the not?

After much gawking I had moved on to laughing hysterically before I gawked again this time trying hard to methodically search for the source of the diamond shape damp. Did she wee-wee, had an accident and wet her skirt?

Being a female myself, I know very well that is not the spot for a wee-wee accident. Relative to that, around the waistline you can also find the same dark blue spots. So it can’t be a wee-wee accident and must definitely be a true case of perspiration!

That is my theory and I must say I need second opinion!

With the assistance of my colleague Liza (while laughing like mad), we have concluded that if you do not want to sweat on your sheshe; do not sing in very high soprano voice. Liza is very analytical; she even includes the possibility of an overly bushy bush causing the matter.

 

Please bear in mind that this is only a suggestion and the scenario above is just our proletarian hypothesis influenced with very sick humor.

However, we do strongly believe that Rexona needs to transfer their prominence on the glorified armpits and start introducing a new range of deodorant because some people just sweat among their bushes!!!

Wahahahahaha!!

ouch!

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:: Tips & Tricks :: How to download Youtube Video to your PC


Today during my morning break, my friend asked me the question on how to download youtube video. It gave me an idea to write down this tips because i’ve done it since early last year.

So, now I will teach you two ways on how to download videos either from youtube, google video, metacafe, myspace etc etc etc..

1. You can download Vdownloader here . Then, go to Youtube page. Copy URL of your selected movie and Paste it in that software. After that, just click DOWNLOAD !! that software will download the movie and automatically convert it to MPG files.

2. However, for easier way, you can use Firefox browser and install VideoDownloader extension from Firefox Add-on page.

VideoDownloader will add a small icon on the status bar at the bottom of your firefox window ,and a toolbar button after installation. Just click that and download the video you are watching !

The video will be download as FLV file, so you need FLV player.

Download FLV player

Have a try !!!

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