My in laws came to visit last Friday. All of us was resting in the living room having tea and homemade kuih-muih that my mom in law – mil brought from home. They were all smitten with Miki so the spoilt little boy got to be hold all day long especially by his grandmother.
Excited with all the attention that he was receiving; Miki was all giggly, wide eyed and salivating down to his chin. I mean, that’s just Miki, he would get excited staring at his musical crib toy, at the cartoons playing on TV, at people who make silly faces at him… excited almost at everything that moves and plays music.
And the reason Miki salivates is because SOMEONE didn’t get his Mummy the thing she craved when she was preggie! Not because he actually wants something to eat!
But nope I guess my mil didn’t know the part about the watch, she thought Miki wanted to have a taste of the food that she was having!
And oh didn’t her hand moved so fast?! She was going…
“ Alaa, sayang..sayang…”
and half a nanosecond later she POPPED A CHUNK OF KUIH APAM INTO MY BABY’S MOUTH!!
KUIH APAM!! I jolted with shocked spasm, the ventricles in my heart detonated, I somersaulted, hit my head on ceiling and I died on the spot.
When I came back to life, I remember saying
“Heeeeeiiii! Why did you do that??! Why did you feed him??”
I remember what I blurted was nothing obscene but my tone was definitely high. Oops I think I raised my theater-performing-voice to my mil!
And oops I think I am absolutely super duper angry!
Kuih apam?? Why kuih apam?? Why not Big Apple Donuts or sushi or durian? WHY FEED DIYANA’S BABY WITH SOLID FOOD? WHY? HE IS JUST THREE MONTHS OLD!
The brain inside my head was bubbling and vaporizing and if she was just an inch away from being Azman’s mom, it would have exploded through my ears. It has been so long since I felt such anger! My son is an infant, he may look like he is 6 months old but he is indeed three! No three-month-old eats solid. His system can’t digest anything but milk what makes she thinks he can digest that freaking KUIH APAM?? Miki spitted out the chunk luckily, ELSE HE COULD HAVE CHOKED, COULDN’T HE? And that KUIH APAM, we don’t even know where it has been!
Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends, please do attempt murder on me this way. If you want to kill me, just make Toi the champion of Akademi Fantasia but please do not harm my child. Yes I know Miki is unharmed in the incident but now historically it is not me – Miki’s mother, the one that suffered an e.p.i.s.i.o.t.o.m.y over him, that officially feeds him his first solid food. And to think that my son’s first solid food is non other than KUIH APAM, I declare now that as a mother I am a complete failure.
Baiklah, saya ingin pergi menghentuk kepala ke dinding sekarang. Nanti saya akan tulis lagi…
must be real...
