Why I don’t read your blog without wanting to die immediately
When it comes to reading other blogs I can be really weird.
First I like to read really good blogs that are rich in content, whom writers are on the same wavelength as me, really pretty website template and accompanying pictures, witty and entertaining. The problem is I also like to visit blogs that are so goddamn stupid, ugly, boring, full of colors merelit-relit liplapliplap like a Christmas tree and the Christmas tree is all it has, totally no content at all.
I think there is something wrong with me – while I am on that blog I would feel my heart throb with agony, my pimples burst out volcano-like pus on their own and my hair falling onto the keyboard like maple leaves in autumn. Yet I continue to read and I feel myself slowly dying. So I stop and move on the next stupid blog and the same painful circle happens again so I had to scream WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU READING? And click on the X button.
The next day I visit those blogs again. I think I am addicted to stupid.
Please bear in mind that these blogs are LOUSY ACCORDING TO ME ONLY! To other people they might be a total work of genius, an award winning work of entertainment. So before you judge me, let me declare that I too realize that I also blog like crap to certain people. Let’s face it – some like it merelit-relap some don’t.
These are the blogs that make me wanna vomit blood:-
1) Blogs that ask questions. Each and every blog entry is nothing but, “Hello, What you readers having for lunch today? I am having lasagna!” Then post one photo of lasagna that is not even original but taken from the web. That is his/her lunch entry. Dinner entry; “Hello, what you readers having for dinner? I am having Nasi Ayam!” Then post one photo of nasi ayam taken from the web. I vomit blood one full bucket.
2) Blogs that are full of advertisements. Making money out of your blogs are good but try not to be so blatant about it! When doing a sponsored entry kindly don’t start with “I would like to tell you about this deodorant but it is an ad, so actually I don’t have dark armpits, you know!” Oh a good blog advertorial should be convincing enough that readers do not know you are paid to write about that and hello if your armpit not dark why you wanna write about armpit whitening product? *pengsan* vomit blood two full buckets.
3) Blogs that are full of wrong spellings done INTENTIONALLY! I don’t know, maybe I am just too old for dy for dia, bleyh for boleh, ak for aku, ai for I. If the blogger is a teenager I can understand that they are in the verge of the hormonal geyser but a full grown man/woman? The language we used reflects our mentality. Leave bahasa pasar at the pasar. Vomit blood three full buckets.
4) Blogs that are totally selfish, narcissistic and pointless. Example – diyanazman.com. Enough said. Why do you think I keep coming back to my own blog? To vomit blood of course.
Four types are enough I believe. Happy blogging everyone!
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17 Comments »
Jade on 28 Jan 2010 at 11:40 am #
agreed with no.3.. hampeh betul..
sebab saya ni dh la susah nk phm bahasa singkatan..contohnya ak = aku..
if saya terclick that kind of blog, cpt² lari dr blog tu.. apa guna nk baca entry tp saya sendiri tak phm..
sila guna bahasa yg mudah difahami.. sekian terima kasih
ah fan on 28 Jan 2010 at 11:46 am #
intro: same with me, i will continue reading and my mulut also continue caruting! #1: lg pathetic when she/he asks the readers tetapi 0 comment pulak, sah org malas nak layan. #2: cr duit extra la tu nak beli beg toot, toot, dan toot toooot. #3: tu arr psl, ak pun x ske taww ckp ak ak mcm itew! hahahha! #4: owh, mak pasrahhh!
Nize on 28 Jan 2010 at 11:46 am #
a’ah..berkenaan dengan bahasa dy, ak, bleyh & ai..seperti bahasa makhluk asing aje..dan
erkk…suka tak suka aku terpaksa tgk iklan “1 trick of a tiny belly” kat blog diyanazman.com..aksi perut dengan memakai bikini, berambut kuning & berantai merah..! hu hu hu..maafkan aku =P kepeh kepeh kepeh
Kak Anie on 28 Jan 2010 at 11:48 am #
Hahaha…Diyana….akak tak berapa suka baca blog yang banyak lip lap lip lap…sikit2 okaylah…pastu yang penuh dgn adverts…
Pastu yang isi kandungan dia sama aje…asyik makan…makan…makan…sesekali okaylah kan…
Nikki on 28 Jan 2010 at 12:18 pm #
That is uncannily trueeee…I find myself doing the same too ! And I often wonder if I have a penchant for self-torture…I just see myself stupidly going through all the stupid things in the stupid blogs over and over again, rather stupidly…thanks for making me a tad bit normal again…(tad bit, cuz it ain’t normal is it ?? ) LOL
hugs to miki from niki
Phy on 28 Jan 2010 at 12:27 pm #
terasa..terasa.. aku pong suka cakap “Ai” hahahe!
tapi takpo, aku still suka bace diyanazman.com
yasmin on 28 Jan 2010 at 12:29 pm #
Hahaha…
Yea.. AI for I (aku pun pernah jumpa blog mcm ni..n masalahnya glamer pulak tu)..kikiki n blog mcm christmas tree..hahaha..mmg lawak la hang ni
brobanithemosteligiblebachelor on 28 Jan 2010 at 3:20 pm #
ak x taw nk komn aper. tp kdg2 ak ske gak tlis mcm niy…lalalalalalalalalala
ana on 28 Jan 2010 at 3:39 pm #
tambah sket
yg sticky post panjang berjela2…
kalau nk baca entry baru..kena scroll down smpai muka surat bawah sekalik
aduhhhhhh letih!!
tobat saya tunggu berhari2 baru masuk balik blog tu
saya pon tak suka blog fancy2…pening tgk
dah tua kot saya ni
raggedyanne on 28 Jan 2010 at 6:19 pm #
lagi 1 jenis blog yg buat i pening, yg tulisan kecik besaq kecik besaq & full of short forms yg i tak paham.
si anggerik on 28 Jan 2010 at 6:46 pm #
haha but still i luv to read ur blog and see ur cute son,miki. plus ur writing pon sempoi.
Mel on 28 Jan 2010 at 7:56 pm #
i hate bad spellings! and bad grammars/vocabs
bukan nak cakap apa…at times kan kalau u tau that blog ada salah spelling atau tuturkata grammarnya..makes u go cringe…
like terbau kentut yang amat busuk..yeckk!!!
ayaq on 28 Jan 2010 at 8:19 pm #
Keep the sms language solely to handphones please. Standard abbreviations takpa la kan, tp klu tlis cmni cne nk bce?????
ai don laik dis!!!
mama emma® on 29 Jan 2010 at 1:39 pm #
eh, bukan cool ke sebut ai ai nie??? trend kan?
*mak yg ketingggalan jaman….*
opY on 29 Jan 2010 at 4:04 pm #
Point no 2.Blogs that are full of advertisements.>buat gwa vomid blood like 10gazillion times!!!!!!
ape2 diyanazman rocks!
sekian
kitt on 01 Feb 2010 at 2:31 pm #
haha.. 7 full buckets of blood in total.. pegi hantar kat tabung darah cepat…..
ai loike ur blog neway..
mommy to chumsy on 01 Feb 2010 at 10:11 pm #
i always visit your blog becos you crack me up
errr…i hope my blog is not like those you have described …..hehhehehe