Attack of the Ferocious Eating Monster – Me!

I have never felt so hungry in my whole life the way I have been feeling hungry for the past couple of months. In every breath that I take, for every step that I make, in every gossip I pass around, in every Google search I type; I think food.
I am trying hard to understand my new body, the one that acts so amazingly mysterious and unpredictable.

Every night, I would wake up 3 or 4 times simple because my tummy was yelling fill me up, im freaking empty! Then I think of me with Afdlin Shauki’s body with boobs, and force myself back to slumberland. In my sleep id dream of Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory, and how I would lay on the candy grass, surrounded by my most favorite things in the world, FOOD! Other times I would dream of Ramadan Buffet and how I will go round and round the table to enjoy the splendid delicacies. Every night I dream of food and even when I take a nap on the afternoons too.

Nowadays, I would need to take seven to eight meals just to stay alive. A delay in consuming foodstuff of say eight minutes from my biologically scheduled meal time would be resulting a painful dying sensation. And according to my biological schedule, my meal time happens to be at every hour. When hunger strikes, within seconds gas will build up so aggressively in where my esophagus and stomach meets. You will know exactly how it feels if you have tried being pregnant before or if you have ever swallowed a bowling ball.

Burping wont help. Lying down will make it worse. Walking slowly to the kitchen would only means by the time I reach the fridge I would already look like the cutest pale skinned zombie with Victoria Beckham’s hairstyle. My limbs would shake, head will spin. And if I still don’t eat ten minutes later, I would vomit despite the empty stomach. Then I would be a vegetable for the rest of the day. A fully dysfunctional human being.

Took me a couple of weeks to map my new eating pattern. I am now accustomed to pre-planning what to eat in the next hour at the very moment I wipe the smudge on my mouth from the earlier meal. Here’s the eating journey that I had in one of the days from earlier weeks. I actually note everything down.

6.45am – Every morning I wake up hungry. Small portion of hot white rice with tuna and potatoes. Some orange juice.

 

8.00am – At the office café. A full bowl of lontong or mixed vegetables stewed in coconut gravy, eaten with rice cubes and begedil or fried potato and meat ball. Glass of cold water.

 

10.00am – At my desk. Starvation strikes. No food can be located in my surrounding. Dashed to colleague’s place and eat her cookies.

 

12.45pm – Cant wait for lunch time at one. Eat full plate of rice with lotsa vegetables, fish and beef. Plain cold water for drinks.

 

3.00pm – A Chicago Beef from 1901. Thanks Rena for getting it for me at Alamanda. Feeling great and energetic.

 

6.30pm – On way home from office. No food in car. Eyes blurred. Fingers shaking. Succumbing slowly in painful starvation.

 

7.45pm – Too weak to cook. Too weak to sit on chair. Laid flat on couch. Azman served take away food. Thanks sayang! What would I do without you?

 

9.00pm – Slowly feeling better. Drinks lotsa juice and eat fruits.

 

10.30pm – Poor Azman needed some air. Went out to Mamak and I had a roti canai with succulent mutton curry. Drank a glass of iced syrup. Roti Canai and Kari Kambing are matched in heaven.

 

12.30 am,2.00am, 3.00am, 5.00am- Woke up hungry. Think of Adibah Noor. Went back to sleep.

Wouldn’t be able to go through a day without Azman. Thank God I have you.

Author: Diyana

19 thoughts on “Attack of the Ferocious Eating Monster – Me!

  1. Hoh sedapnya makanan semua di atas. Ayaq pun buleh makan byk kalo mcm tuh. Huhuhuhuu.

  2. They key of MY survival in the office is to make sure that there is food 100 radius from Diyana’ place for if she gets hungry and there is no food in sight, the chances of her biting off a big chunk of my succulent, juicy arm is high.

    Diyana’s a monster!! but a cute one indeed hehehehehe

  3. Ya la Di, u got to eat for two nowadays. Ya thank God Azman is around…. u need him more after birth.

    Just a caution, start getting advice on how to lessen the stretch marks…..

  4. ooh…oh…jadual makan KU hanya 1 pinggan 3 kali sehari..seperti jugak jadual ubat yg doktor bagi 2 biji 3 kali sehari (kalo demam)..keh keh keh.. :sinchan:
    Diyana..perubahan ini adalah akibat pembawakan budak dalam kandungan..harap pn. diyana sihat dalam perjalanan kandungan ini..aminnn!

  5. hmmmm….virus makan dah menular kat puan D…aku memahamimu…kekekeke…time aku dah berlalu couple months ago…few tips yg aku bleh kasi: for breakfast, lunch n dinner u need nasi.in between those time, get ready ngan biskut, chocolate/ice-cream,3in1 Milo,roti. on da way balik umah..kena stand by dgn roti dlm keta..sama jugak untuk supper….for 1st trimester mmg penat(penat makan) 2nd trimester nnti rilek skit…kurangkan gula/garam dlm makanan…bykkan makan makanan yg boleh tambah darah..if not, u’ll be like me…anemia…bykkan sayuran hijau…apa lagi ekk?
    tapi sure seksa bangun pagi2 buta just to get some food….last time, aku hy ambil roti putih n glass of milk…samada ko bancuh n simpan dlm peti/beli je yg ready made….umah org pregnant…peti full dgn food…sekian.. 😀

  6. hmmm….

    the eating fetish that u seemed to develope during ur pregnancy is easily being understood…. maklumla, MAK BUYONG…

    But for those non-MAK BUYONG people who happen to induldge in this frenziness ni camna pulak????

    waaaaaa……….. cant imagine IF i ever get married and swallowed basketball esok ni, how would i be?

    huhuhuh

  7. hehehe..yeah itu pembawakan baby tuh…no worries…u won’t end up like adibah nor…or afdlin shauki..because u r eating for two now.. 😉 sian baby kalu tak kasi dia makan……and..take atie advice…she seems to be the experienced one… love yah sis….

    P/S: nanti kenduri akak..hang mkn sebelum n selepas akad ok…..akak suruh mak akak masak nasi tomato lebih..just for u….hmmmm i should have count as 3 pax for u instead of two pas…ekekekee

  8. jadual makan diyana yg sebenarnya adalah setiap setengah jam atau lebih tepat lagi setiap minit har har har

  9. woman – that’s a lot of eating! and the thought of adflin and adibah scaring you is funny! hahaha. nvm lah, 9 months only – baby needs food, so EAT UP!

  10. Bakal2 bapak akan jd husband yg teramat mithali dlm 9 bulan yg ahmat critical ini dan seterusnyeeee……..Pengalaman paling best….Tgk masa baby kuar dlm delivery room……Allahuakbar…Subhanallah….

  11. all becoz of hormon change, bukan baby tu yg nak mkn sebyk tuh…consider urself lucky la compare to others yg xleh nak mkn apa2 not even plain water…

  12. Di darling, pregnancy is NOT the time to diet or to think of Adibah Noor or Afdlin Shauki! We watched this great documentary, ‘In The Womb’ and we know for a fact that babies need all the nutrients their mother can supply to them in truckloads. Besides, there are plenty of gyms nowadays 🙂

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